welcoming B1560UFQ

B1560UFQ has arrived yesterday
haven't tried to ride it yet
still nervous :p

my last days..

i am gonna say good bye to many things in my life :
1. 2009
2. my beloved Pico which always be with me in this last 2 & half years..
i am so sad to let him go
3. my single status, you know i am going to get married next month..
it wont be the same anymore..

now i want to enjoy it..

so uneasy..

feeling blue today..
why life seems so difficult for me?
i know i should feel gratefull but i dont feel that way now..
just forgive me God

i feel unsattisfied with one person
i cant tell
i hope i dont have to deal with him many times in my life
just dont like him or you may say i hate him a little bit..

watched new moon last saturday with Carin @ Premier Senayan City
the movie was good, i like it..
but again Edward's face is too white & his lips were too red
i still don't think he is handsome
i prefer Jacob, i can see his love ^^
i am jealous with Bella, not because of Edward but because of her posture, so slim n tall :(

everything going well..Thx God!

g ke hotel kemaren..
fixed makanan n did the payment
g dah order food for the party
300 porsi buffet
100 porsi bebek peking
100 porsi salmon
250 porsi live cook tepanyaki
250 porsi dimsum
150 es puter

dekor juga dah clear
gown dah pilih
kue dah fixed
tinggal konfirmasi soal drum dari Grace n tentuin sound system
fitting, diet, n perawatan..

Thanks God

hi there

so long time i dont write..
miss you much blog
i am so busy doing this and that :D

now, almost the end of november
i am still preparing my wedding
almost done, but still need touch in everywhere..

i really wish i can have a full week break so that i can sleep,
beberes rumah, and do my financial calculating...

so many things to tell
just dont know where to start

super headache today

hari ini ada meeting management..
dan kepalaku sakit bgt.. (ga ada hubungan ma takut meeting :D)

the ugly truth

i saw this movie with my brother
a comedy movie, konyol but funny in some part
tadinya g pikir drama, ternyata g salah hehe..

100 days to go to my day ^^

100 is good number right?
perfect!
g mengeluh banyak hal belakangan ini
i should have not :p
i should feel grateful rite?
at least : i am gonna get merried, i ll have a friend for the rest of my life,
i am gonna be a quenn for a day..
see, i am so blessed :p

100 days to go..
let's make it perfect!^^

new bag :p

yesterday i went to grand indonesia to buy myself a dress for my another outdoor prewedding photoshoot
i got a warehouse red dress, a necklace, two pairs of earings, a belt
then this bag..

i still want a black Charles & Keith shoes & a black clucth
i am so ready for both photoshoot & party :p

sutoresu ga tamatteru..

kepala gue rasanya penuuuuh bgt
mumet ni :(

mbak yatih minta berhenti hari ini
kurang ajar kan?
dia baru sms td pagi & hp dia ga aktif setelah itu..
brengsek kan?

mungkin dia udah ngerencanain ini
g makin curiga karena duit bazar kurang 406.000
duuuh pala g bnr2 penuh
hate this situation so much >_<

my busy day..

one thing i learned recently is
human is not an angel
we can't multi tasking everytime
i tried hard to make everything runs smooth at the same time
but the fact is all that i am doing is kacau balau
i dont concentrate in doing things
so nothing runs perfect, sadly...

yesterday, when i calculate sales of UPH's bazaar at Gris's house
we found out there are big number of selisih (what is selisih in english? please remind me..)
i dont know what cause it
i know one thing, i might be loose some money this time
& i should be careful next time

i am doing too many thing at the same time,
i am tired
my apartment is like a big mess now
i only go home for sleep & leave at early morning
i hope, i can manage my time better & get everything doing right...
please help me God

1st day

masuk kantor lagi after 9 days long holiday..
agak2 males kemaren but just fine today :)
ayooo semangat!

jalan masih kosong ni...yeay!
tapi tol naik, hiks!

tol dalam kota 5.500 jd 6.500
tol taman mini 1.500 jd 2.000

i made up my mind ne di hari 1 kerja:
- organized purezento lbh baik
- stock opname
- start diet, at least loose 3 kgs

ganbare!^^

long holiday

senangnya...
2 hari lagi libur, yeaaayyyy!
g bakal libur dari tanggal 18-27 September
senang, riang..
moga aja g bisa beresin banyak hal:
1. beresin lemari
2. beresin rak buku
3. beresin stock barang di rumah
4. beresin stock barang di toko
5. beresin srapbook g
6. beresin kamar

intinya beberes during holiday...

supplier yang oto ono..

huh!
g sih seneng kalo org mau pesen barang ke gue
mau belanja sama g..
kenapa ya supplier g ga mau angkat telpon g?
ga bls ym an g..
ga bls sms g juga..
stress ni
g butuh barang ne


ini bukan isu rasial kan?

my weekend's review..

3 bazar di minggu yang sama..
2 sukses, 1 BEP
lumayanlah..Puji Tuhan :)
bodohnya g ga mendokumentasikan bazar g ne..hehe

jadwal bazaar g yg baru lewat:
10-12 sep : binus kampus anggrek
11-13 sep : la codefin
11 sep : bappenas

next bazaar :
28-30 sep : UPH
19-25 okt : BHK
des : christmas fair MOI

> still waiting for other offers
> looking for jeans supplier
> going to make "nicelusi" brand jeans :)
can't hardly wait ^^

recently

recently i always feel tired
i dont know why..
maybe i have so many things to do
or because i am not so goog in managing my time

those marriage things
my new bussiness
all bazars that i attended
my mezzy apartment

i love seing things in proper but i dont know why my desk at the office, my room, my apartment never look tidy

oh gosh, i dont know exactly what i want know..

wedding day come closer
am i nervous? no, i dont think so..
i just feel some people are suck

prewed photos part 2

Love is..

Love is patient, love is kind, it doesn't envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easyly eagered, it keeps no records of wrong.
Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

1 Cor 13, 4-7

pre wedding photos

love this video much..

i am so jealous with this couple
their clip is so gorgeuos..
http://vimeo.com/6047917
i also have my prewedding photo shoot @ singapore
but i can surejly say
their is much-much better than mine..

damn tired

duh capek banget g..
kepala g mulai2 sakit ni..
kayaknya krn g bener2 forsir diri deh
sabtu ngajar, trus plg masih ke mal
minggu pagi2 udah ke bandung
di bandung juga mobile terus, nyampe rumah 01.30
tgl 17, ke kelapa gading, ke cengkareng, green garden than senci
damn,,tenaga g ga mau memulihkan diri

i am so tired

learn how to make shoes

I took this pitcure few months a go..
This lil girl is my cousin.

What i try to write here is not about her or what she was doing.
But what i want to share is about children nowadays.
Few days a go, i talked to my costumer, she own a course
i asked about her course, open what time, how many student, & blabla..

You know guys that now, children at Jakarta enter a bimbingan belajar from elementary 1st grade? wow!
when they play? they should happy n play at that age rite?
how cruel if the parents took their playing time for course A, B, C

When i was lil girl, i usually played with my sibling or friends after school
I did homework of course, but didn't need whole day rite?
I dont know who or what to blame, school, teacher, or our education system?
oh come on, children should play..

never have enough time

million things to do, but i always feel that i dont have enough time..
i think beside i do have a lot of activities, i also a bad time manager

my marriage is come closer
5 months to go.. (should i feel happy or sad than?)
so many unfinished things
1. invitation
2. wedding gown
3. cakes
4. bridesmaid's gown
5. parent's gown
6. souvenirs
7. misa's text
8. choir
9. songs
10. church administration

OMG, maybe still many things that have forgotten by me :(

than i should prepare for UPH festival
i checked half of my stocks last night
since i did it while chatting with ike, i haven't finished it yet..
but i found out that there are many things i should order
hufh..i need more capital

still havent organized all photos of travelling,
still havent post my travelling notes

still many, many things to do...

review

travelling date : July 20 - 27
schedulle :
day 1 : singapore : bugis junction, esplanade
day 2 : singapore : prewed photo shoot
day 3 : singapore : prewed photo shoot, kuala lumpur
day 4 : shenzhen : window of the world
day 5 : shenzhen : lou hu plaza, hongkong : the peak, madame tussaud museum
day 6 : hongkong disneyland
day 7 : macau
day 8 : hongkong : ladies market, shenzhen
day 9 : kuala lumpur : suria klcc

hotel's review:
1. singapore : grand central : strategic, downtown
hotel royal newton : nice & cozy, near bus station, not too far from
orchard
2. Kuala lumpur : tune hotel : like capsule, only bed, a little bit dirty
only for sleep
3. Shenzhen : best western felicity : old but good
4. Hongkong : cosmopolitan : small but nice, service was good too

singapore pre-wed

went to singapore @ July 20th, 2009
get my photo shoot @ July 21 & 22
location :
day 1 : botanical garden, palawan beach @ sentosa, singapore flyer,esplanade
day 2 : chinese garden, japanese garden, national museum
photos upload soon :)

i am looked old

so sad i am..
looked old & unhappy
am i?

i am trying to not worrying things now
trying to smile a lot, having fun & enjoying my life
i don't wanna looked older than my age
i wanna be happy ^^

grand opening

yatta!
after long preparation between my busy schedule, finally its officially opened.
Yeay..wish me luck everybody^^

come & shop ya...

i am an optimist

i hate people saying negative things..
"worry doesnt removes the sorrow of tomorrow
it only takes strength of today"
& remember GOD is GOOD
trust HIM & Have faith

i went to MTA yesterday & found out that the sales was terible
not even half of target sales
i was very upset & felt desperado..

i went home early yesterday coz my maid is planned to come & do cleaning stuff
but she didnt appeared..
than i called my bf & first line of the conversation is
i think you'll be lost.."
i hate him so much for saying those words
he should be encourage me & give me support
i know he didn't meant it, but please say positive words to me

i was fallen slept when Gris, my cousin, PIC @ Purezento's Bazar
called me & tell me the good news
our sales had reach the target & get over it

See..
Miracles do happen
I could smile on my sleep then..
Thank you Jesus, Love U

booth Purezento @ MTA

please come & shop ^^

i Thanked God for ...

1. gave me the greatest mom (she was great woman, that's why God took her back very
fast)
2. gave me great oportunities to get proper education; college, study abroad,
courses..
that's made who i am today
3. not letting me become stuborn person
4. my nice sibling
5. gave me obstacles & helped me overcame it
6. the blessing everyday
7. my boyfriend
8. the brain He grant me
9. everything in my great life

i really need sleep

today is the third day of my attending @ bazar Mal Taman Anggrek
still 11 days to go but i already feel very exhausted

i think i cant open my other store @ fx tomorrow
i am too tired & need sleep
T_T

just wish me luck

things that i miss lately..

- school life
- japan, shizuoaka

i do really miss Japan, hope i can go there next year..
wish me

anne of green gables

just finished read this book
last part made me cried...

get ready for "school holiday event" MTA

We are going to open a stand at MTA from June 23 - July 5.
The stand is very2 expensive, but we (me, maya & endro)think it's worth to try...
Just wish us luck ^^

please compare..

i found this blog oneday
http://dianarikasari.blogspot.com
it was nice blog

than, i found this blog today
http://hottalotta.blogspot.com
so terible...

dont laugh please, huahaha...

damn..visa required

from information we've got
going to Shenzhen, China dont need a visa
we can apply visa on arrival there..

one thing you should remember,
"don't trust what people said, you should find out first
from trusted source"
find out from the embassy..

why finally i found out that China needs Visa?
one day I googled, in the list of visa on arrival's country
there was no INDONESIA

now, we should pay Rp. 472.000,-
for double visa, hiks! T_T

preparation

i will have my pre wedding photoshot on July 20,21 @ Singapore..
since i already pay a lot, so i want & hope the photos will be great
i shopped so much lately
i spend so much money buying cute t-shirt, dresses & accecories
i also did my hair-do ( i permed it again :D )
bought cosmetics, made a night gown & blablabla...

oh, it cost me a lot, hope it will be worth it ^^
pray for me :p

i do love my family

sometimes it just to hard to please everyone
sometimes i tried to do things properly
but some people seems so hard to compromize & cooperate

i hate to have enemy
i dont feel ok if someone hate me & dont want to talk with me
especially my sibling

dont people has brain to think?
that one person is combination of positive & negative things
dont you ever expect only good things come
please think from the other side
dont you thank them for good side
it just not fair to think only negative sides

model & hasil

besok Endro mau disumpah & me n family will go to Bandung tonight
karena besok mau foto & bln dpn jg photo shoot bt foto prewed g, so g ke Maymay buat potong n perm
g bw model yg g mau...
you can tell the different, haha

Till death do us part

28MAY
Till death do us part
All these while our blogs shows so many happy moments of couples in love. That’s refreshing. But last weekend, we’ve just realized that life is more than that. Life is short. Life has its moments. Happy, sad, hopeful, despair, triumphs and lost all mixed together, without us knowing which sequence is next.

The sudden lost of our friend Andreas (Andy or AZ) last weekend was heart breaking. We knew him for a while, not only as our client, our supplier but also our friend. His cheerful jokes and kindness is contagious to those around him. Being with him for a while makes you feel special. Our condolences to Mirari and his family, may God’s grace and strength be with you always. Please scroll down and read "All about Andy" by Mirari, take your time to read this note and remember to love.

Below are some pics of Andreas & Mirari on their wedding day. It’s a wake up call for us to cherish our loved ones, shower them with love every single day, till death do us part. Coz we’ll never know when our time is up.









---

"All about Andy" by Mirari

For those who haven’t known me,
My name is Mirari, Andreas wife for 22 months and three days, his best friend for 8 years. I met him, 8 years ago at church on a coffee table. Andreas is a friendly person, who like to embrace new incomer, and I was lucky enough to be greeted by him, and how he then invited me to meet some more people and introduce me to his bible study friends. Then the friendships grows into love… It was just beautiful at His time.
On Friday morning at 11.24, Andreas had his first heart attack, he wrote to me a message on my cellular:
“I’m at the office babe, want to get my purse that I forgot in car, but as I walked back from car to the office, I had a hyperventilation attack, I was sweating, but 10 minutes later was normal. My tummy is gassy mm.. I had to lie down on the floor and calm down, deep breaths, nobody in office knows, coz I’m still having the hyperventilation attack if I’m too vigorous, chest pain.”
But since the signal is bad at the hospital part where I work, I didn’t get it, until around two when I stepped out the building. I was so shock when I heard the news, I tell you, I regret big time, that I think I should ran to him straight away and bring him to doctor. I offered to take him that afternoon to the doctor that he didn’t refuse.
But another shocking news is, actually, I just found out yesterday from church friends that Andreas went to office church that very moment, to say hi to church friends, do some library work (my husband is the head of church librarian), fixing some church computer, and have lunch with the staff. He ordered gado2 his favorite dish. Strangely he didn’t tell me about it, we both tell each other what we are doing as day goes by.
I did wonder why, maybe he knows me so well, that if he told me, knowing he had this attack, I would have stopped him to go church. But going to church to do what he had to do, is what he intended to in his last time.
To that I did not regret that he didn’t tell me. No, instead I’m proud of him, that he set a good example to all of us, that he has fight his battle to the end, he win the race, he ignore his physical pain, just to serve his Father.
Andreas has been serving in many ministry, he helped to manage the church library, prepare for printing of church hands out, he was in music ministry, puppet ministry, Sunday school teacher, helped me in orphanage ministry and best of all, his husband ministry to me.
Around 4pm Friday, I was on my way to pick him up, and arrived at a hospital. He seemed okay, just looked tired, we chat as normal, and he even was busy playing sally’s spa a game on my ipod as we were waiting to see the doctor. He asked me how was my day going, just normal conversation. No hints of pain, his eyes are just cheerful as before.
After that, time ran so fast, it went from bad to worse. I would like to skip the part, as that’s the most painful fact, doctor said, there is a heart injury, not yet, infarct, but need a special care. Andy was found it disbelieve, he looked at me and asked, why are you so sad? is it that bad? It can’t be right? Shortly we were ready to take him to different hospital with better expert for his treatment. We stopped by at home on the way to pack up his clothes.
I told him that he need to rest and just sit down on the table, I begged him, but I remember he was pushing me, hushing me upstairs to our room and said, “look at me, I’m fine..just walk..go, go” while pushing me with his arm to go up.
That was THE BIG regret in my life that I should have pinned him down, and tied him to the chair downstairs. He insisted to company me and there upstairs he collapsed. He went into fit, I screamed like hell, and called my mum in law. It happened so fast, that I don’t even think I’m ready to share that horror night to you right now. It was just too fast. I saw him stopped breathing, no pulses, eyes closed.
Being a doctor, doing a CPR to your own loved one is just something you don’t want to do, nor remember, it’s just horrible. I can taste blood mixed with froth on his lips, I banged at his chest, I didn’t think I did a good CPR, it was just mixed between screaming and crying desperately want to bring him back. I told him, focus hunny, just don’t leave me yet..please..i beg you.. God, I beg you give him chance. And he opened his eyes. That night was a night of miracle. He was so calm, and just back to normal Andy except that he had oxygen tube on his nose. Cardiologist said that his situation is under control, he is young so he can fight. He basically has his second chance of life, as normally those who had this attack won’t pass that horrible night. Now it make sense to me, that God grants me that time, for him to be ‘stable’ again, so that I can showed my love to him and had a good memory of him.
According to his ECG results, which were just separated between 2 hours, doctor said it was so much different between the two. It shows the heart condition went from bad to worse. It’s like when you have a sprain ankle. It’s just an injury, but when you forced to run 50metres with that ankle, you may break your ankle and even leg.
Questions and regret fill me, had he not go to the 2nd floor with me, he would still be with me now. But why? Why didn’t I rebels his order to trust him that he was okay and want to company me. Why?
I blame myself a lot…a lot and a lot..
But, yesterday as I walked back to the empty room, our room that we designed together, I walked the same steps we walked, I can feel him pushing me to go up, I remember him holding my hand. At that night, I thought of him as stubborn, but now, I just realize that he want to live up his memory with me, in our room, in our library on the 2nd floor… he didn’t want me to feel lonely but remember him as a loving and unselfish, supporting husband. Most of all he wants me to remember him as a strong husband. And He is for me, he is my hero, my soul mate, my lover, my everything.
On Saturday morning before he entered the angiography room, I read him psalm 91, he listened carefully, and he smiled at me, telling me, he loves me, and sorry that he is sick and not strong for me. He asked me if I still love him despite his condition. I told him, of course I still do..of course, and you’ll get better I told him. I kissed him..on his head,… told him I love him and to that he smiled and I took his photo, turned to be his last picture with smile. I let him go to angiography room. There he had another cardiac arrest, the blockage was in his crucial heart artery, it’s worse than the cardiologist had expected. When I heard they were giving him dopamine, giving him this and that medicine, I knew he’s not well..i ran outside and I screamed, I cried in disbelief…
The doctor had to put him to sleep, so that his lung and tense heart muscle can rest. Then they decide to call the heart surgeon for emergency heart surgery. But the team then decided to let the heart rest for some more hours before they do the operation. They told me, after that turmoil, his condition was under control.
But he never made it into the operation theatre, Jesus called him that very afternoon on Saturday 23rd of May at 3.30. The good thing is, he never has to go through the pain of surgery knife, and the doctor to cut open his chest.
I never left the hospital for as long as he was there…but just when the doctor said he was stable, and I thought he was under control, I decided to go out to refresh my face, change clothes, so that I want him to see me fresh up.
He told me the night before, why you looked so tired hunny? Why you looked so sad? So I promised not to. The voice was so strong, telling me above my hesitant that I should leave hospital for a bit, just to be refreshed and be back strong and clean for him.
but just when I left.. he slipped away from me, he didn’t even want me to see his departure. My dad called my mum who accompanied me, and asked me to go back to hospital.
Just maybe not even 1 km I left the hospital..i went back, I ran back to the ICU and I found no more heart beeping sign in the machine, Blood pulse 0….straigth line.. and another life resuscitation was taken this time with all doctors and team involved… Medically, I understand the situation, I screamed, I was angry, frustrated, I was mad at him for not fighting for me…I told the team not to stop pumping…the room was filled with people singing and praising God. I just got angrier, that’s not how it should be,. we should do more medical intervention..noo..no.. I got very upset. I got very mad because Andreas dedication song for me in our wedding is: I want to grow old with you (Adam Sandler). I was mad..extremely.. mad to God, mad to doctors…mad to myself…mad to the stupid respiratory machine… Suddenly I felt so weak…I couldn’t hold it..my world is broken down into pieces.
I lost my mind, i could only remember my parents hold me tight. Hugging me, pulling me from the bed when I climbed the bed.
One by one people told me to let him go…let him go.. So..there he has gone..forever. Yet, I didn’t let the nurse to take out the tube of breathing support from him, I still want to remember his chest moving up and down, as I slept next to his stiff body, his head and his body was still warm, but his eyes are empty..i grieved.. I cried..I kissed him over and over…as much as I could before I know his body will go cold… And I just want to be there..just there…on his right side, as we are lying on bed at night, how I stared at him when he sleep. He was just sleeping I thought..
You know, Andreas told me, he will take me to Vancouver this July for our 2nd year wedding anniversary… We had our honeymoon in Banff Canada, so it would be great memory, to that I haven’t even had time to said yes.. but..now, if he asked me would I go to where he is now..i would.
Now, this is how I remember Andy,
At home, he is a loving, unselfish husband, he has been the most important person in my life, he’s supporting to my career, he has been the best friend I’ve ever had. Words can’t express my feeling right now when I want to name all the best characters in him. You know, we are the great traveling buddies. Together, we have traveled to many places, Rome, Italy, many parts of germany netherland, Austria, Netherland, France, Belgium, Canada, States, Vietnam, Greece, Bali, Menado… and many more… we read lonely planet together, we have collections of the books. Only this one very trip he has to go first…to heaven and left me behind, but I’ll catch up. To that I ponder…, I realize, that Jesus has given ticket to him to heaven, just him without me. I can’t buy that ticket, it’s given,.. Yes, nothing I can do to win that ticket except to accept his salvation and live at best.
I want Jesus to find me and give me that precious ticket to sit next to him again.
When Jesus? How Jesus? Tell me, I’ll pack up and go next to my husband companying him in his journey to that beautiful place.
Being a doctor, I have seen many death, many life saving effort, as the matter of fact, that’s what we trained as, to save life… but this time I can’t save him, and I don’t need too, Andy is in his eternal life with his father, I have to let him go.
Trust me, I can only write here, but I don’t know how I will find strength to put myself together, reality is suck!
The pain of separation is unbearable, but slowly, a baby step at a time, I want to live my life at best, want to introspect my self, want to be a better person, want to follow Andy’s steps, and read the most complete version of lonely planet : “the Holly bible”, whatever..i can do, so the HE found me, and grant me this ticket to sit next to him.
These past 2 nights without him, I slept at the same bed side as he always sleep, I hug his sleeping pijama, where I can still smell him, I used his toothbrush, his watch and glasses still on the table, his work, his bible, his book, his gadget, his bb, his playstation, everything he left…as if he’s gone just for a short period, a jogging perhaps, and will come back soon. I am expecting his call, am expecting his kisses at night, his hugs, and smile.
But I know, days will go pass, and dust will cover his belongings… but he will never text me, email me, hugs me, kiss me anymore.
Now, that will always be only kept in my heart… We made our vow to each other. We memorized our part, and in front of the altar we promised to take care of each other, we are one flesh! He’s in me, I am in him. We are soul mate. Till death do us part. (Aaaahhhhh..it’s not just a line. Damn it… It’s real!!!! It’s real…it’s real). This is it??
So now when my other half is gone, please do understand that I need to go through this grieve period. I know some of you want me to smile, want me to be happy, I will..i will, but I need to grieve just for sometime, as I just lost a part of me. Otherwise I never can never face my life, I will be empty and just lost hope. I need to gather my strength, and understand my situation now, and ask God, what He wants me to do now.
You never can’t imagine the pain of separation I have now. You don’t want to stand here in my position waving so long to your loved one, to see his cold body, his ignorance to my call, his stiff hands doesn’t hold mine, and soon when they close the cascade, I do not know when to see him again. TRUST ME, YOU DON’T!!!!!!!!!!
Asuk, mami, mama, papa, sisters, brothers, family and friends…
One thing I know that Andy would love to say this to you, that he loves you all.
He would hug you and smile and humbly said: thank you for coming..
Mama/papa, Andy has prepared a trip for your wedding anniversary, you must take it. He loves you both. Sorry, that Andreas and I can not give the grandchildren you want.
Asuk/Mami, please love each other...asuk protect and love mom and Sam, as best as you can, spend more time with them including Connie/Nick and grandchildren who is far away. Thank you mum, for raising up such a great guy like him, and let me love him and serve him at the short time.
Connie, so sorry that we have such a short time together last October.
Believe me, Andy wants to visit you this July, he told me that he hasn’t spent enough time with you. He is not going to make it this July, but please remember the thought that he loves and think of you in special way.
Cousins, keep on playing badminton, even though he’s not there, Ko yang yang, ko Aries, Chai… Ko Siung2, thank you for being his closest friends and share with him the gadget talk and shared his stories.
Sam family, please stay in harmony and in peace. Andreas is a peaceful maker, he never hold his grudges to any bad sayings or wrong accusations, he said..it’s okay, let’s be positive, let’s love each other. He loves all his uncles/aunties, from First uncle, until the last aunty..never once he said bad about you guys.
He taught me how to love and value extended family, and respect you guys.
Staffs, thank you for working with him and serve him when he is still sitting on that cubicles, giving you calls and commands. But I’ve learnt that he’s a great boss at work, he never forget to said thank you, and he doesn’t mind to listen to their stories when they were venting.
Church friends, college and high school friends, thank you for being great friends to him, to love him and offer the friendship. Please continue to pray for me, I need your support to go through the days. I hate the night-time since the memory of him is so fresh, and I felt a great lost, but am glad when the day come, when I’m surrounded by love and encouragement knowing that I’m not alone.
Betsy, you will find soul mate as great Andy that God think suit for you, you will.
Grace/Tilo, grab the opportunity to receive Jesus’s salvation, our time is precious. Andreas always pray for you Tilo, you don’t know, but he does.
Samuel/Merlin, love each other the best you can… Merlin, love Sam when God still allows you. Sam, you too… follow your brother’s example, he is the best loving husband I’ve ever had. He loves you, and tried to set a good example of big brother.
As the matter of fact, now, I’d like to encourage you husband and wife, to hug each other, maybe now, maybe later, tell them every night, before go to bed…that you love them… as Andreas and I always do… because we never know God’s time. Yes, I do envy you who still can hold hands and receive kisses from your husbands when you are sad (perhaps after you are reading this letter), but it’s okay, I can only be content with Andreas imaginary hugs right now. He’s right here somewhere with me. Give me strength and comfort to finish the lines.
Husband, download the song: “I’ll take care of you” by Steve curtis chapman. Andreas has won my heart by playing his song…. He’s taking care for me from afar now.
It is a dark night now, but we must be prepared for the morning. There will be light in the morning, there will be crowds of happiness, a reunion, we will be called up and meet our beloved one who has gone before us.
Life is so short, this is a serious fact, trust me.
Nobody know, how long we are still allowed to stand here, and how or which way God will pick us up, and where He will place us. I can’t tell how will I die, when, nor when will you be die… I know it’s so scary, but trust me, it’s real. None of us know. Life is just like a dust.
But, If we want to be at the same trip to Andy, we must do better in our lives, and accept Jesus precious gift to save your life. As God add years to your life, ask Him also to give Life to your years…may it be meaningful life, as Andy has. He has won the race. He got straight A, GPA of 4.0, Suma Cum laude! he passed and graduated this class, he left this learning class of planet earth, and enjoy his reward.
I love your dearly hunny, I miss you dearly, if only I can exchange these hundreds of emails, greetings, phone calls, sms-es, hugs…with just one hug and one last word from you…if only I could….If…
As a good friend of Andy, Ken said, “there is a big hole in my heart that can’t be replaced by anyone but Andy, but it will stay next to bunch of good memories I have with him”
But hunny, I will do my best to live a life so that Jesus find me and place me next to you…soon, very soon… to change this mourning into Joy.
As I read to Andy this verse, I will reread again to you.
“Those who live in the shelter of the Most High, will find rest in the shadow of the Almighty.”
Let us remember him in any way he has influenced your life.
See you later husband, see you later soul-mate.

so sad that i want to cry..
dont know what to say, just pray that God will give her strenght

for my future husband : "babe, i hope we can grow old together..
promise me you'll never leave me alone in this world"

i know how it feel left by our loved one
i still miss my mom & dad
i try hard to not thinking of them so that i wont be sad,
yeah..it's a denial, i know..
i just can't bear the pain

my brother's graduation day

today is my brother's big day
his graduation day, finally!
setelah perjuangan sekian lama...hehe

unfortunately, cuti g dah abis n i can't be there for him today
i feel sorry, but i will go to Bandung next week
minggu depan dia bakal disumpah..

anyway, Congratulation kobenk
sukses terus! ^^

night at the museum 2

i saw this film with my sister Cha2 n my cousins Grace & Carin
2 anak kecil itu sih bilang bagus, maybe because they still lil girl
buat g sih, ga seru abis, ngantuk bo!

privileged

i love watching this drama lately...
agak telat si, secara ini drama thn2008
tp g baru tahu..ini pun ditawarin tkg dvd di mangdu ^^

Mengapa kita perlu ke Gereja

Good Stories!
Cerita 1
Seorang Katolik menulis surat kepada Editor sebuah surat kabar dan mengeluhkan kepada para pembaca bahwa dia merasa sia-sia pergi ke gereja setiap minggu. Tulisnya, "Saya sudah pergi ke gereja selama 30 tahun dan selama itu saya telah mendengar 3000 khotbah. Tapi selama hidup saya tidak bisa mengingat satu khotbah pun. Jadi saya rasa saya telah memboroskan begitu banyak waktu demikian pun para pastor itu telah memboroskan waktu mereka dengan khotbah-khotbah itu."
Surat itu menimbulkan perdebatan yang hebat dalam kolom pembaca. Perdebatan itu berlangsung berminggu-minggu sampai akhirnya Ada seseorang yang menulis demikian:
"Saya sudah menikah selama 30 tahun. Selama ini istri saya telah memasak 32.000 jenis masakan. Selama hidup saya tidak bisa mengingat satu pun jenis masakan itu yang dilakukan istri saya. Tapi saya tahu bahwa masakan-masakan itu telah memberi saya kekuatan yang saya perlukan untuk bekerja. Seandainya istri saya tidak memberikan makanan itu kepada saya, maka saya sudah lama meninggal."
Sejak itu tak Ada lagi komentar tentang khotbah.

Cerita 2
Nenek Granny sedang menyambut cucu-cucunya pulang dari sekolah. Mereka adalah anak-anak muda yang sangat cerdas dan sering menggoda nenek mereka. Kali ini, Tom mulai menggoda dia dengan berkata, "Nek, apakah nenek masih pergi ke gereja pada hari Minggu?"...."Tentu!"
"Apa yang nenek peroleh dari gereja? Apakah nenek bisa memberitahu kami tentang Injil minggu lalu..?"
"Tidak, nenek sudah lupa. Nenek hanya ingat bahwa nenek menyukainya."
"Lalu apa khotbah dari pastor?"
"Nenek tidak ingat. Nenek sudah semakin tua dan ingatan nenek melemah. Nenek hanya ingat bahwa IA telah memberikan khotbah yang memberi kekuatan. Nenek menyukai khotbah itu."
Tom menggoda, "Apa untungnya pergi ke gereja jika nenek tidak mendapatkan sesuatu dari-Nya?"
Nenek itu terdiam oleh kata-kata itu dan ia duduk di sana termenung. Dan anak-anak lain tampak menjadi malu. Kemudian nenek itu berdiri dan keluar dari ruangan tempat mereka semua duduk, dan berkata, "Anak-anak, ayo ikut nenek ke dapur." Ketika mereka tiba di dapur, dia mengambil tas rajutan dan memberikannya kepada Tom sambil berkata, "Bawalah ini ke mata air dan isilah dengan air, lalu bawa kemari!"
"Nenek, apa nenek tidak sedang melucu? Air di dalam tas rajutan....!
"Nek, apa ini bukan lelucon?," tanya Tom."Tidak.., lakukanlah seperti yang kuperintahkan. Saya ingin memperlihatkan kepadamu sesuatu."
Maka Tom berlari keluar dan dalam beberapa menit ia kembali dengan tas yang bertetes teskan Air..!!! "Lihat, Nek," katanya. "Tidak ada air di dalamnya."...."Benar," katanya. "Tapi lihatlah betapa bersihnya tas itu sekarang."

I am sick of getting sick again

if you have weight problem like me..
once you may think that how nice if you can got sick than you will loose weight after that...
i was too
i was jealous with Maya, after sick, loose 2kgs
i was thinking if i could get sick n loose 2kgs, it would be nice...

i tell you one think,
that was very bad idea
i was sick 2weeks a go, and should stayed at hospital for 2 nights & need 3 more days to recovery
i dis loose weight but i loose my cherish, my spirit too
i also can't do my daily activities like before
can't go to gym regularly, should thinking about what to eat carefully & blablabla..

yesterday, i got migran again, same shymtoms like before
my eyes were very tired & felt my body was full of gas.
i couldnt eat, couldnt think, couldnt work
it was very terifying...
one more bad news, i still should drive home
Thank God i arrived Tomang safely...

now, i realize, no matter we are fat, no mather we are thin, the most important thing is we are healthy..
that is the precious thing in the world...
trust me

dasar babi..

dont know much bout flu babi..
i rarely listening to news report on TV,
actually i rarely watch TV
but from the news i watched this morning,
a TKW who just arrived Jawa Timur from Taiwan was detected by temperature detector &
dia dicurigai terkena virus flu babi...
tahu ga, ternyata sblm sampai ke Indonesia dia ternyata mampir dulu ke hongkong..
Oh, No..
I desprately want to visit Hongkong Disneyland this July...
Oh, Swine Influenza, go go away..

can't hardly wait...

kenapa kalo kita cemas, biasanya akan baik2 saja..
kalo kita plong, malah yg terjadi sebaliknya?

g org yg hampir selalu optimis
dalam banyak hal..
dalam rencana hidup, dalam studi, dalam kerjaan
tapi klo kita udah berhubungan sama org, kadang susah ditebak juga sih...

nah, g dah deg2an aja ga kan diapproved permohonan cutinya
g apply lah dengan modal nekad, pokoknya HARUS diapproved bagaimanapun
apalagi cutinya masih 2.5bln lagi
i told you earlier, i promised to complete my job, so please let me go...
i need an escape

akhirnya td tanda tangan itu diberikan...
yeay, i am very happy
2.5 months from now, i am going to go to hongkong disneyland, yeayyy!
thank you sir, & Thanks GOD
luv You...

miss my daily activity

dah 3minggu ni ga fitness
sejak terima job ngajar hari kerja
ditambah bisnis baru g,
trus g sakit pula
g jd keteteran fitness
i do really miss that activity..

i hope i can reach financial freedom soon
so i have more time to do exercise

ah, besok aku mau fitness lagi...

I'm Afraid of 16 out of 72 Common Fears

copy paste from Gilda's blog :P


I fear...

[] black people
[] the dark
[x] staying single forever
[] being a parent
[] being myself in front of others
[] open spaces
[] closed spaces
[] heights
[] dogs
[] birds
[] fish
[] spiders
[] flowers or other plants

total so far: 1

[] being touched
[x] fire
[x] deep water
[x] snakes
[] silk
[] the ocean
[] failure
[] success
[] thunder/lightning
[] frogs/toads
[x] my boyfriends/girlfriends dad
[] my boyfriends/girlfriends mom
[] rats
[] snow

total so far: 4

[] rain
[] wind
[] crossing hanging bridges
[x] death
[] heaven
[x] being robbed/mugged
[] falling
[] clowns
[] large crowds of people
[] men
[] women
[] having great responsibilities
[] doctors
[x] tornadoes

total so far: 7

[] hurricanes
[x] incurable diseases
[x] sharks
[] Friday the 13th
[x] ghosts
[x] poverty
[] Halloween
[] school
[] trains
[] odd numbers
[] even numbers
[x] being alone
[x] becoming blind
[x] becoming deaf
[x] growing up, old

total so far: 15

[x] creepy noises in the night
[] not accomplishing my dreams/goals
[] needles
[] blood

total = 16

If you get more than 30, I strongly recommend some counseling.
If you get more than 20, you’re paranoid.
If you get 11-20, you are normal. ✔
If you get 10 or less, you’re fearless.
People who don’t have any are full of crap.

same with Gilda's :)

keep healthy baby...

sakit itu bener2 ga enak...
ga bisa ngapa2in bo
apalagi buat orang2 yang hidup sendirian kaya g...
duh, repotnya setengah mati
after 28 years of my life
akhirnya g ngerasain diopname
kronologis ceritanya gini:

rabu malem tgl 22/04/09 g ikut acara Financial Clinic di the Cone FX
ACnya dingin banget bo...
bayangin deh ruangan dengan AC central blower atas yg tiap 15cm ada blowernya
dari sini nih awal penyakit g
pulang dari situ jari tangan ma kaki g mati rasa kayanya
besoknya g mulai radang tenggorokan,
tapi dasar g males k dokter g biarin aja..

than, sabtu sore g ngerasa dah ga enak, g k RS Royal Taruma lah,
biasanya sih g k Meliana, tp sabtu dia ga praktek
so, g dpt antibiotik, obat flu n obat batuk...

minggu pagi g bangun dengan kepala berdenyut2, tapi g tetep ke gereja
as usual sarapan susu WRP plus biskuit Trenz 1 bungkus
pas sebelum misa pkl 8.30 dimulai, g minum tuh obat...
jreng..jreng...
jam 9 donk bo, pas lagi homili, g tiba2 berkunang2
mau ga mau g minta tolong org sebelah buat tlgin g n blek dalam hitungan detik g terkapar pingsan...

singkat cerita, g siangnya balik k RS lagi dianterin maya
n karena g duduk pun puyeng n mual so g disaranin opname
2 malem g sendirian di RS, ada sih yg jenguk
but ga enak deh di RS, biar dikasih makan mulu..
ga enak makanannya...

well, sehat itu penting da..

time flies...

April almost end ni..
gila cepet banget bo!
but i am so exiting ^^
it means tar lagi g bakal jalan2...senangnya o^_^o
dah bisa merasakan semaraknya disneyland
dah bayangin cute disneyland storenya...
ah, jd inget masa lalu,hehe
i am so disney store freak
secara dulu tiap g libur n sempet main ke Tokyo g selalu sempetin ke disneyland (walaupun cuma sampai gerbang masuknya, hehe..) buat liat n beli koleksi baru disneyland store, haha..

tralalala..so happy, so exited!
just 2 months to go ^^

purezento

lama ga nulis nih...
bingung mau nulis apa, hehe
anyway, g dah dpt tempat buat buka toko...
blm dealing, still working on it
i ll tell you the details soon
just wish me luck

wrp diet centre

g termasuk orang yg naik turun berat badannya...
ga dalam jangka waktu pendek, tapi dalam hitungan tahun
misalnya waktu g kuliah, berat g tuh sekitar 52-55..
than waktu g skripsi n stress, g jadi 60 (hiks..)
trus g diet pk wrp n berhasil jd 50...
trus selama g di jepang th 2003-july 2005 berat g cenderung stabil 50-52, pernah sampai 46 sih...
pulang dari jepang ni, program balas dendam makan...trus ditambah g sering entertain klien, berat badan g melambung jadi 60 T_T
trus g diet, ikut program slimming dll...
yg paling efektif adalah olah raga, pelan2 berat badan g turun
slowly but sure

than g coba program WRP diet centre
so far (in 4 weeks) i made it
i am 51 now...3kgs to loose & i am gonna be preety with my wedding gown *^_^*

so, i think you should try if you have weight problem^^

april mop

hehe...
ga ada niat buat isengin orang n ga diisengin siapa2 kok
cuma inget aja hari ini 1 April..
hiks, triwulan pertama 2009 sudah berlalu...
Ayo semangat!^^

numpang beken

Cleo edisi April 2009

up date diet

hm..lumayan, nimbang minggu kmrn berat g 51.9kg
i still have to loose 3.9kgs
but since my bday g mkn agak kacau nih
hiks...
i hope i can loose few ons this week to :(

after the honeymoon

I finished reading this book last night...

G jd berpikir :
Menikah itu suatu keputusan berat
terlepas dari kita bisa bersama-sama orang yg kita cintai
tp kita tetap 2 pribadi yg beda
punya pikiran, keinginan, & kepribadian masing2
it's gonna be tough to dealing with each other

G sendiri ga suka diatur
G suka memutuskan apapun sendiri
after i got married i should compromize with him every single day
i should tell him anything
oh my...

It's a little bit scary for me
can both of us understand each other?
can we still love each other after we get to know each other more & more?

I thank God that I dont have to get marry in young age
I have no idea how 18 year old girl wanna get marry with her bf
Marriage is not only about sex rite?

Oh God, help me through this...

120 days to go..

huffhh..
still 120 days to go...
can't hardly wait ^^

starting diet...

feb 13th, i went to another wedding expo @ Four Season hotel
the wed expo was great but that is not the topic actually
...
when i was there i've visited WRP diet centre booth
as astrid said, if you sell something to me, than i'll buy it
that is one of my weaknesses

back to the topic
at the booth, i found out that my weight is 55.7kgs..OMG
so i joined the club since they gave me 50% off during exhibition
i started diet than & on March 7 my weight was 52.7kgs, and on March 9 my weight was 52.4kgs...
i think this is good, rite?

now, for a while i have to say
byebye ice cream, byebye rice, byebye sturbucks
i should be patient to eat you for about 2 months
since my ideal weight is 48kgs
and i should loose fat about 6.7kgs
this is the hardest one
because even i am go to gym every working day
the fat loves me too much that they dont like to go away

wish me luck everybody

confession of a...

g ngaku kalo g pacaran telat
sampai2 takut ga dpt jodoh
tapi finally God gave me someone...

adanya kejadian2 dlm hidup g
membuat g kepikiran
g bersyukur pacaran telat
jd g ga usah ngerasain patah hati terlalu sering
hehe...

for Gilda ni:
everything beauty by its time
jd dari segala kejadian yg ga enak buat kita
g tahu pasti selalu ada yg bisa kita syukurin
(yeah, i know...lu pasti bilang ngomong si gampang,hehe..)

shop till you drop

ah, Charles & Keith diskon...
tadinya g ga tau, tapi pas jalan sama Astrid diajak mampir
you know lah weakness of a woman is sale, haha..
g liat sepatu ini sale 30% jd cuma 269.000
g beli deh, hehe

trus besoknya g mampir lagi di CK TA
g beli lagi 1 bo!
white one, as I wanted & this one is cheaper
cuma 169.000
plus 1 sunglasses seharga 219.000

oh, shopping selalu membuat ketagihan...

what woman wants

Hahaha...
Ga segitunya kali...

curhat yg tertunda...

bete banget g rabu kemaren
gue kejebak macet 2jam
gara2 ada truk pasir terbalik di interchange Cawang menuju tol jagorawi
hiks, g sampai kantor 09.45

ini biang keladinya

funny story of Endro

haha..adek g kocak banget
tadi pagi dia telpon g, trus kita ngobrol2..
g tanya, "ko, lu ga kerja hari ini?"
dia blinag:
" lu tuh sama aja ma maya, sibuk kerja jadi lupa hari ini hari nyepi "
g sempet bengong, kok g bisa ga tau klo libur ya?
trus g inget kayanya nyepi maret deh
"g bilang yakin lu libur? kok g ga tahu..., kok semua org kerja?
lu salah, maret lagi nyepi.."
trus dia merhatiin kalendernya lagi
Haha..ternyata kalender bulan Maret
kebetulan tgl 26 sama2 kamis
Hahaha..bodor bgt, dia ga janji pasien krn dia pkr libur,hehe

my very first platinum

hehe..gaya kan?
g punya kartu platinum hehe :D

we do never know...

hiks2..
kami terpaksa menghanguskan tiket Jakarta - Batam tgl 19/07/09
karena hari ini ada tiket Rp. 0,- untuk Jakarta - Singapore untuk tgl yg sama,
n kami bisa berangkat bareng berlima, hiks2... T_T

tahu ga masa Jakarta - singapore cuma Rp. 85.000,- tmsk bagasi 15kg...
what a cheap flight?
bahkan lbh murah daripada naik ferry :(

Kursus Persiapan Pernikahan

finally...
sertifikat udah di tangan gue ma Yan
after taking Pre Merriage Preparation Course tanggal 14,15,21,22 Feb ini secara full, kemaren kita dah dapet sertifikat & 1 step buat persiapan sudah dilalui...

The Course was good, even sometimes penyajinya kurang menarik dalam penyampaian materinya..
but somehow, pengetahuan g ttg kehidupan perkawinan secara Katolik lebih terbuka..

The main idea of marriage is LOVE, ini ditekankan bgt...
than pusat dari segalanya adalah our beloved JC

Materi yg paling menarik n buka wawasan g adalah mengenai KB alamiah
did you know before that :
1. Kita bisa mengetahui masa subur kita dari mengukur suhu tubuh setiap pagi setelah bangun tidur sebelum melakukan aktifitas apapun dengan naruh termometer di bawah lidah selama 5mnt.
Suhu yg kita ukur kita catat dari awal masa haid sampai haid berikutnya.
Dari grafik yg kita buat, kita bakal tahu kapan masa subur kita.
2. dari masa subur ke mens selalu 14hari
3. masa subur cewek ternyata cuma 4 hari, so kalo mau bkn anak & udah lwt 4 hari masa subur, kita harus tunggu bulan depan
4. pada 3 hari pertama masa subur, sel telur belum dilepaskan dari indungnya
5. ternyata kita bisa ngatur anak cewek / anak cowok lho...
caranya : berhubunganlah pada masa ovulasi
sperma cowok : x & y
x : anak cewek, bentuknya gemuk n lamban, bertahan 3harian
y : anak cowok, bentuknya panjang n gesit, hanya bertahan 1 hari
klo kita berhubungan di 3 hari pertama masa subur, kemungkinan dpt anak cewek lbh tinggi, but...
klo bikin anak pas ovulasi 70% pasti anak cowok lho, krn si y geraknya cepat
5. KB buatan sering berdampak tidak baik untuk badan cewek...
6. Sel telur cewek cuma bertahan 1x24 jam

Hm...baru tahu lho g ttg ini semua, than g bersyukur g dapat pembekalan ilmu2 yg berguna buat kehidupan perkawinan g tadi...

Sayang ga semua cewek dpt pengetahuan ini, klo mereka tahu, ngapain juga mereka harus tersiksa dengan alat KB sepanjang tahun padahal masa subur cewek cuma 4 hari, kalau saja dia tahu ttg KBA...

sweet invitation

dont you think that this invitation is simple but nice?

pink phanter 2

- Kocak : lumayan
- Tegang : Not at all
- Menghibur : Yes
- Komen : Kalo lagi stress n butuh penghiburan boleh nonton film ini ^^
Quite interesting kok, buktinya nonton 21.25 pun g ga ketiduran
di bioskop

finally...

after searching2..
cocokin budget
finally tempatnya fixed for my wedding day
we decided to held it @ Aston Atrium
hope everything runs smoothly.. :)

happy valentine's day

happy valentine's day everybody :)

sebeeeel

sebel deh karena ga ada 1 pun TV swasta yg jumlahnya lebih dari 10 di Jakarta yg nayangin American Idol season 8 T_T
g terpaksa nongkrong di gym sampai jam8 buat nonton, hiks

12 years

today's is friday the 13th
& today my pa was passed away 12 years
I should checked about the document of his makam
i always forgot

papa...
may Jesus has forgived all your faults
rest in peace, hope you are happy there now
see you papa
oneday, we will meet again

test food

tommorow at 10 am, we, me, cha, yan & grandma
will have food test @ aston...
hopefully the test will be ok (i dont dream to have great taste)
people always say : ada harga ada barang...
even for me Aston is quite expensive (Rp. 150.000,- ++/pax)
but compare to other hotel, the price is maamaa yasui;)
wish me luck everybody^^

yeayyyy!

dapet tiket murah lagi bo!
Air Asia mang ga ada duanya,hehe
sempet bete sih krn leumot bgt hr ini
mungkin sejuta umat cari tiket Rp. 0,- kali ya
finally confirmed juga tiket Jkt-KL-Jkt g ma Yan
so, if we can't ford a lot of money for honey moon,
or we can't get honeymoon tour from sin,
we'll just spend time in Singapore n malaysia for a week
Rp. 490.000,- only for two of us bo!
cheap? yeah...

L for...

from Gilda ne..
hm..looks difficult

Rules


It's harder than it looks! Copy to your own note, erase my answers, enter yours, and tag 10 people. Use the first letter of your name to answer each of the following questions. They have to be real. . .nothing made up! If the person before you had the same first initial, you must use different answers. You cannot use any word twice and you can't use your name for the boy/girl name question.

1. What is your name: Lusi

2. L four Letter Word: Lucu

3. L boy's Name: Louis

4. L girl's Name: Lindsay

5. L an occupation : Lawyer

6. L color: Lime Yellow

7. L Something you wear: Long Pants??

8. L food: Lontong

9. L Something found in the bathroom: Loreal Shampoo ^^

10. L place: London

11. L reason for being late: Laziness

12. L something you shout: Leumot!

13. L movie title: Life is Beautiful

14. L something you drink: Lemon Tea

15. L musical group: Limb Bizkit

16. L an animal: Lembu

17. L street name: Latumenten

18. L for car : Lexus

19. L song title: Loving You

20. L verb: Like

ramalan tarot

kemaren vaseline lagi ngadain acara di TA
g iseng beli buat dpt weker sama free manicure-padicure
trus dpt free tarot reading juga,hehe...

g iseng aja, krn ga ngantri
trus masa g diramalin bkl merit lbh cepet (how come?)
katanya bakal ada uang masuk tp keluar lagi (hm..gajian tiap bulan jg gitu,hehe)
trus katanya g blh ngajuin 3 pertanyaan?
heh? apa ya? secara g iseng doank
akhirnya g cuma tny 1 : gmn karier g?
dia blg prospek karier g bgs, g bakal panjang di perusahaan yg sekarang
(oh, baguslah..hehe)

udah itu doank, secara g ga gitu pengen tahu ttg future g :D

not a great day...

it's friday but i feel bad
why?..
1. g dimarahin td pagi
another miscommunication with finance director
huh...i admit that i am a careless person
but i am trying hard to fix my bad habbit & it's worked
2. still waiting for the final conclution of management meeting about salary
3. bad mood liat temen kantor g asyik leha2 maen kompi trus masih jg nyuruh g email
kerjaan dia k klien, padahal dia 100% nganggur.
4. ganggu gara2 temen g dengan seenak hati pake printer kantor buat ngeprint stiker
undangan meritnya tanpa sungkan sedikitpun depan g n bos, pake tinta n stiker
kantor pula
5. tommorow is another boring wiken
ngajar untar libur, pgn k mangdu beli gorden tp ga ada temen
huh!!!
6. mobil g udah diservis rabu kemaren tp tetep ga beres, besok g kudu k bengkel lagi

hope your week end is better than mine....

ful time house wife

g lagi ngobrol2 ma co g...
ngobrol2 biasa
dia bilang dia dpt undangan makan siang dari istri temennya
g tanya istrinya kerja apa?
dia bilang full time house wife

talking about full time house wife
g suka bingung lho mereka ngapain aja
apalagi istrinya temen co g ini ga punya anak
g bertanya2 ngapain aja dia di rumah??

setau g acara tv di indo tuh parah
sinetron ga jelas, gosip all day
ok, i admit klo g kadang nonton gosip atau nonton tukul klo bintang tamunya menarik
tapi klo sepanjang tahun?
big no-no deh

di jaman susah kaya gini kok bisa ya orang ongkang2 kaki di rumah?
kenapa ga kreatif dikit gerakin roda perekonomian?
kalo laki kaya raya pun ada kegiatan sosial yg bisa dikerjakan bukan?
belanja n masak mang butuh waktu berapa banyak???

maafkan atas sikap sinis g terhadap ibu rumah tangga yg males2an di rumah...

living with stranger...

semalem g baru kepikiran 1 hal :
OMG..I am gonna live with 'a stranger' whole my life starting next year
'a stranger' karena g baru kenal dia 2 tahunan,
we never lived at the same roof so i dont know exactly how is he
we have different interest, different background & blablabla...
beda sama klo g tinggal sama sibling g
i have spend most of my life with them
we have same parents, same blood, have shared a whole life

last night, i stared at my future husband's pic&
told my self
'this person is one who will standing beside you a whole life...
in happy & sad time...'
it was a little bit scary
but lets dont worry bout future
pray,pray.pray...

good luck!

pentingnya arti kecap..

siang ini g makan baso malang
nitip OB..
g dah pesenin supaya minta kecap
tapi dia lupa kynya...

alhasil g ga menikmati baso g
kuras mak nyusss kt g...
mkn asal ga laper

ternyata kecap tu perannya besar
makan capcay dgn telur ceplok tanpa kecap manis aja
rasanya gimanaaa gitu
hehe..

view from my window..

g suka duduk di atas tempat tidur di samping jendela tiap sabtu pagi
sambil mandangin sungai di bawah apartemen g
hari2 biasa g ga sempet santai2
tiap bangun tidur langsung rusuh mau k kantor
tapi klo sabtu, g lbh santai..
g ngajar jam 9.30 & Untar ga jauh dari apartemen g...

sebenarnya alasan g dulu milih lantai 19 adalah krn alasan view...
nyatanya, g hampir ga pernah liat ke luar jendela tiap pulang kerja atau kapan pun...
tepatnya g hampir ga pernah di rumah...

klo g lagi santai, g suka berimajinasi
klo sungai itu airnya jernih tanpa sampah
than kapal penyebrangan itu adalah canoo...
rumah2 disamping2nya bukan gubuk tapi rumah2 gaya Eropa yg g suka liat di film2
hehe...dgn ngayal, g jd ngerasa klo apartemen g itu viewnya indah bgt:D

visiting Athai...

g sedih kondisi Athai drop
tiba2 kaya loose her energy
dia ga punya tenaga buat duduk apalagi jalan...
emang si Athai dah hampir 98
tapi g masih berharap Athai bisa hadir di pernikahan g
g masih berharap Athai bisa lihat anak g
than kita bisa foto 5 generasi

g berdoa supaya Tuhan kasih Athai energi lagi
g berdoa supaya Athai bisa lebih sehat
but most of all
g berdoa yang terbaik buat Athai

GBU always Athai...
I know that your faith will make you stronger & happier^^

gong xi fa cai

lama juga ga nulis..hehe
ga ada cerita seru soalnya...
so-so lah
a little bit review aja

26 Jan kemaren Imlek...
Imlek ga seseru jaman masih kecil dulu
dulu kayanya selalu ditunggu2, sekarang kok biasa aja ya?
g rasa alasannya begini :
1. waktu kecil seneeeng bakal pake baju baru; sekarang kapan pun bisa beli & pake baju baru jd ga gitu exited lagi d :(
2. waktu kecil klo imlek bisa collect angpao, skr dah gede gini, malu bo, tapi masih ngarep si..:D
3. waktu kecil, seneng bisa makan enak, bnyk kue, minum soft drink, klo sekarang: males masak, makan di luar wiken jg biasanya gitu, makan kue2 kering takut ndut..soft drink? big no-no...

g ga tau ya, klo anak g tar bakal exited ga klo imlek,hehe...

short story

PEREMPUAN YG DICINTAI SUAMIKU

Kehidupan pernikahan kami awalnya baik2 saja menurutku. Meskipun menjelang
pernikahan selalu terjadi konflik, tapi setelah menikah Mario tampak baik dan
lebih menuruti apa mauku.

Kami tidak pernah bertengkar hebat, kalau marah dia cenderung diam dan pergi
kekantornya bekerja sampai subuh, baru pulang kerumah, mandi, kemudian mengantar
anak kami sekolah. Tidurnya sangat sedikit, makannya pun sedikit. Aku pikir dia
workaholic.

Dia menciumku maksimal 2x sehari, pagi menjelang kerja, dan saat dia pulang
kerja, itupun kalau aku masih bangun. Karena waktu pacaran dia tidak pernah
romantis, aku pikir, memang dia tidak romantis, dan tidak memerlukan hal2
seperti itu sebagai ungkapan sayang.

Kami jarang ngobrol sampai malam, kami jarang pergi nonton berdua, bahkan makan
berdua diluarpun hampir tidak pernah. Kalau kami makan di meja makan berdua,
kami asyik sendiri dengan sendok garpu kami, bukan obrolan yang terdengar, hanya
denting piring yang beradu dengan sendok garpu.

Kalau hari libur, dia lebih sering hanya tiduran dikamar, atau main dengan
anak2 kami, dia jarang sekali tertawa lepas. Karena dia sangat pendiam, aku
menyangka dia memang tidak suka tertawa lepas.

Aku mengira rumah tangga kami baik2 saja selama 8 tahun pernikahan kami. Sampai
suatu ketika, disuatu hari yang terik, saat itu suamiku tergolek sakit dirumah
sakit, karena jarang makan, dan sering jajan di kantornya, dibanding makan
dirumah, dia kena typhoid, dan harus dirawat di RS, karena sampai terjadi
perforasi di ususnya. Pada saat dia masih di ICU, seorang perempuan datang
menjenguknya. Dia memperkenalkan diri, bernama meisha, temannya Mario saat dulu
kuliah.

Meisha tidak secantik aku, dia begitu sederhana, tapi aku tidak pernah melihat
mata yang begitu cantik seperti yang dia miliki. Matanya bersinar indah, penuh
kehangatan dan penuh cinta, ketika dia berbicara, seakan2 waktu berhenti
berputar dan terpana dengan kalimat2nya yang ringan dan penuh pesona. Setiap
orang, laki2 maupun perempuan bahkan mungkin serangga yang lewat, akan jatuh
cinta begitu mendengar dia bercerita.

Meisha tidak pernah kenal dekat dengan Mario selama mereka kuliah dulu, Meisha
bercerita Mario sangat pendiam, sehingga jarang punya teman yang akrab. 5 bulan
lalu mereka bertemu, karena ada pekerjaan kantor mereka yang mempertemukan
mereka. Meisha yang bekerja di advertising akhirnya bertemu dengan Mario yang
sedang membuat iklan untuk perusahaan tempatnya bekerja.

Aku mulai mengingat2 5 bulan lalu ada perubahan yang cukup drastis pada Mario,
setiap mau pergi kerja, dia tersenyum manis padaku, dan dalam sehari bisa
menciumku lebih dari 3x. Dia membelikan aku parfum baru, dan mulai sering
tertawa lepas. Tapi disaat lain, dia sering termenung didepan komputernya. Atau
termenung memegang Hp-nya. Kalau aku tanya, dia bilang, ada pekerjaan yang
membingungkan.

Suatu saat Meisha pernah datang pada saat Mario sakit dan masih dirawat di RS.
Aku sedang memegang sepiring nasi beserta lauknya dengan wajah kesal, karena
Mario tidak juga mau aku suapi. Meisha masuk kamar, dan menyapa dengan suara
riangnya,

" Hai Rima, kenapa dengan anak sulungmu yang nomor satu ini ? tidak mau
makan juga? uhh… dasar anak nakal, sini piringnya, " lalu dia terus
mengajak Mario bercerita sambil menyuapi Mario, tiba2 saja sepiring nasi itu
sudah habis ditangannya. Dan….aku tidak pernah melihat tatapan penuh cinta
yang terpancar dari mata suamiku, seperti siang itu, tidak pernah seumur hidupku
yang aku lalui bersamanya, tidak pernah sedetikpun !

Hatiku terasa sakit, lebih sakit dari ketika dia membalikkan tubuhnya
membelakangi aku saat aku memeluknya dan berharap dia mencumbuku. Lebih sakit
dari rasa sakit setelah operasi caesar ketika aku melahirkan anaknya. Lebih
sakit dari rasa sakit, ketika dia tidak mau memakan masakan yang aku buat dengan
susah payah. Lebih sakit daripada sakit ketika dia tidak pulang kerumah saat
ulang tahun perkawinan kami kemarin. Lebih sakit dari rasa sakit ketika dia
lebih suka mencumbu komputernya dibanding aku.

Tapi aku tidak pernah bisa marah setiap melihat perempuan itu. Meisha begitu
manis, dia bisa hadir tiba2, membawakan donat buat anak2, dan membawakan ekrol
kesukaanku. Dia mengajakku jalan2, kadang mengajakku nonton. kali lain, dia
datang bersama suami dan ke-2 anaknya yang lucu2.

Aku tidak pernah bertanya, apakah suamiku mencintai perempuan berhati bidadari
itu? karena tanpa bertanya pun aku sudah tahu, apa yang bergejolak dihatinya.

Suatu sore, mendung begitu menyelimuti jakarta, aku tidak pernah menyangka,
hatikupun akan mendung, bahkan gerimis kemudian.

Anak sulungku, seorang anak perempuan cantik berusia 7 tahun, rambutnya
keriting ikal dan cerdasnya sama seperti ayahnya. Dia berhasil membuka password
email Papa nya, dan memanggilku, " Mama, mau lihat surat papa buat tante
Meisha ?"

Aku tertegun memandangnya, dan membaca surat elektronik itu,

Dear Meisha,

Kehadiranmu bagai beribu bintang gemerlap yang mengisi seluruh relung hatiku,
aku tidak pernah merasakan jatuh cinta seperti ini, bahkan pada Rima. Aku
mencintai Rima karena kondisi yang mengharuskan aku mencintainya, karena dia ibu
dari anak2ku.

Ketika aku menikahinya, aku tetap tidak tahu apakah aku sungguh2 mencintainya. .
Tidak ada perasaan bergetar seperti ketika aku memandangmu, tidak ada perasaan
rindu yang tidak pernah padam ketika aku tidak menjumpainya. Aku hanya tidak
ingin menyakiti perasaannya. Ketika konflik2 terjadi saat kami pacaran dulu, aku
sebenarnya kecewa, tapi aku tidak sanggup mengatakan padanya bahwa dia bukanlah
perempuan yang aku cari untuk mengisi kekosongan hatiku. Hatiku tetap terasa
hampa, meskipun aku menikahinya.

Aku tidak tahu, bagaimana caranya menumbuhkan cinta untuknya, seperti ketika
cinta untukmu tumbuh secara alami, seperti pohon2 beringin yang tumbuh kokoh
tanpa pernah mendapat siraman dari pemiliknya. Seperti pepohonan di hutan2
belantara yang tidak pernah minta disirami, namun tumbuh dengan lebat secara
alami. Itu yang aku rasakan.

Aku tidak akan pernah bisa memilikimu, karena kau sudah menjadi milik orang
lain dan aku adalah laki2 yang sangat memegang komitmen pernikahan kami.
Meskipun hatiku terasa hampa, itu tidaklah mengapa, asal aku bisa melihat Rima
bahagia dan tertawa, dia bisa mendapatkan segala yang dia inginkan selama aku
mampu. Dia boleh mendapatkan seluruh hartaku dan tubuhku, tapi tidak jiwaku dan
cintaku, yang hanya aku berikan untukmu. Meskipun ada tembok yang menghalangi
kita, aku hanya berharap bahwa engkau mengerti, you are the only one in my
heart.

yours,

Mario

Mataku terasa panas. Jelita, anak sulungku memelukku erat. Meskipun baru
berusia 7 tahun, dia adalah malaikat jelitaku yang sangat mengerti dan
menyayangiku.

Suamiku tidak pernah mencintaiku. Dia tidak pernah bahagia bersamaku. Dia
mencintai perempuan lain.

Aku mengumpulkan kekuatanku. Sejak itu, aku menulis surat hampir setiap hari
untuk suamiku. Surat itu aku simpan diamplop, dan aku letakkan di lemari bajuku,
tidak pernah aku berikan untuknya.

Mobil yang dia berikan untukku aku kembalikan padanya. Aku mengumpulkan
tabunganku yang kusimpan dari sisa2 uang belanja, lalu aku belikan motor untuk
mengantar dan menjemput anak2ku. Mario merasa heran, karena aku tidak pernah
lagi bermanja dan minta dibelikan bermacam2 merek tas dan baju. Aku terpuruk
dalam kehancuranku. Aku dulu memintanya menikahiku karena aku malu terlalu lama
pacaran, sedangkan teman2ku sudah menikah semua. Ternyata dia memang tidak
pernah menginginkan aku menjadi istrinya.

Betapa tidak berharganya aku. Tidakkah dia tahu, bahwa aku juga seorang
perempuan yang berhak mendapatkan kasih sayang dari suaminya ? Kenapa dia tidak
mengatakan saja, bahwa dia tidak mencintai aku dan tidak menginginkan aku ? itu
lebih aku hargai daripada dia cuma diam dan mengangguk dan melamarku lalu
menikahiku. Betapa malangnya nasibku.

Mario terus menerus sakit2an, dan aku tetap merawatnya dengan setia. Biarlah
dia mencintai perempuan itu terus didalam hatinya. Dengan pura2 tidak tahu, aku
sudah membuatnya bahagia dengan mencintai perempuan itu. Kebahagiaan Mario
adalah kebahagiaanku juga, karena aku akan selalu mencintainya.

**********

Setahun kemudian…

Meisha membuka amplop surat2 itu dengan air mata berlinang. Tanah pemakaman itu
masih basah merah dan masih dipenuhi bunga.

" Mario, suamiku….

Aku tidak pernah menyangka pertemuan kita saat aku pertama kali bekerja
dikantormu, akan membawaku pada cinta sejatiku. Aku begitu terpesona padamu yang
pendiam dan tampak dingin. Betapa senangnya aku ketika aku tidak bertepuk
sebelah tangan. Aku mencintaimu, dan begitu posesif ingin memilikimu seutuhnya.
Aku sering marah, ketika kamu asyik bekerja, dan tidak memperdulikan aku. Aku
merasa diatas angin, ketika kamu hanya diam dan menuruti keinginanku… Aku
pikir, aku si puteri cantik yang diinginkan banyak pria, telah memenuhi ruang
hatimu dan kamu terlalu mencintaiku sehingga mau melakukan apa saja untukku…..

Ternyata aku keliru…. aku menyadarinya tepat sehari setelah pernikahan kita.
Ketika aku membanting hadiah jam tangan dari seorang teman kantor dulu yang aku
tahu sebenarnya menyukai Mario.

Aku melihat matamu begitu terluka, ketika berkata, " kenapa, Rima ? Kenapa
kamu mesti cemburu ? dia sudah menikah, dan aku sudah memilihmu menjadi istriku
?"

Aku tidak perduli,dan berlalu dari hadapanmu dengan sombongnya.

Sekarang aku menyesal, memintamu melamarku. Engkau tidak pernah bahagia
bersamaku. Aku adalah hal terburuk dalam kehidupan cintamu. Aku bukanlah wanita
yang sempurna yang engkau inginkan.

Istrimu,

Rima"

Di surat yang lain,

"………Kehadiran perempuan itu membuatmu berubah, engkau tidak lagi
sedingin es. Engkau mulai terasa hangat, namun tetap saja aku tidak pernah
melihat cahaya cinta dari matamu untukku, seperti aku melihat cahaya yang penuh
cinta itu berpendar dari kedua bola matamu saat memandang Meisha……"

Disurat yang kesekian,

"…….Aku bersumpah, akan membuatmu jatuh cinta padaku.

Aku telah berubah, Mario. Engkau lihat kan, aku tidak lagi marah2 padamu, aku
tidak lagi suka membanting2 barang dan berteriak jika emosi. Aku belajar masak,
dan selalu kubuatkan masakan yang engkau sukai. Aku tidak lagi boros, dan
selalau menabung. Aku tidak lagi suka bertengkar dengan ibumu. Aku selalu
tersenyum menyambutmu pulang kerumah. Dan aku selalu meneleponmu, untuk
menanyakan sudahkah kekasih hatiku makan siang ini? Aku merawatmu jika engkau
sakit, aku tidak kesal saat engkau tidak mau aku suapi, aku menungguimu sampai
tertidur disamping tempat tidurmu, dirumah sakit saat engkau dirawat, karena
penyakit pencernaanmu yang selalu bermasalah…….

Meskipun belum terbit juga, sinar cinta itu dari matamu, aku akan tetap
berusaha dan menantinya…….."

Meisha menghapus air mata yang terus mengalir dari kedua mata indahnya…
dipeluknya Jelita yang tersedu-sedu disampingnya.

Disurat terakhir, pagi ini…

"…………..Hari ini adalah hari ulang tahun pernikahan kami yang ke-9.
Tahun lalu engkau tidak pulang kerumah, tapi tahun ini aku akan memaksamu
pulang, karena hari ini aku akan masak, masakan yang paling enak sedunia.
Kemarin aku belajar membuatnya dirumah Bude Tati, sampai kehujanan dan basah
kuyup, karena waktu pulang hujannya deras sekali, dan aku hanya mengendarai
motor.

Saat aku tiba dirumah kemarin malam, aku melihat sinar kekhawatiran dimatamu.
Engkau memelukku, dan menyuruhku segera ganti baju supaya tidak sakit.

Tahukah engkau suamiku,

Selama hampir 15 tahun aku mengenalmu, 6 tahun kita pacaran, dan hampir 9 tahun
kita menikah, baru kali ini aku melihat sinar kekhawatiran itu dari matamu,
inikah tanda2 cinta mulai bersemi dihatimu ?………"

Jelita menatap Meisha, dan bercerita,

" Siang itu Mama menjemputku dengan motornya, dari jauh aku melihat
keceriaan diwajah mama, dia terus melambai-lambaikan tangannya kepadaku. Aku
tidak pernah melihat wajah yang sangat bersinar dari mama seperti siang itu, dia
begitu cantik. Meskipun dulu sering marah2 kepadaku, tapi aku selalu
menyayanginya. Mama memarkir motornya diseberang jalan, Ketika mama menyeberang
jalan, tiba2 mobil itu lewat dari tikungan dengan kecepatan tinggi…… aku
tidak sanggup melihatnya terlontar, Tante….. aku melihatnya masih memandangku
sebelum dia tidak lagi bergerak……" Jelita memeluk Meisha dan
terisak-isak. Bocah cantik ini masih terlalu kecil untuk merasakan sakit di
hatinya, tapi dia sangat dewasa..

Meisha mengeluarkan selembar kertas yang dia print tadi pagi. Mario mengirimkan
email lagi kemarin malam, dan tadinya aku ingin Rima membacanya.

Dear Meisha,

Selama setahun ini aku mulai merasakan Rima berbeda, dia tidak lagi marah2 dan
selalu berusaha menyenangkan hatiku. Dan tadi, dia pulang dengan tubuh basah
kuyup karena kehujanan, aku sangat khawatir dan memeluknya. Tiba2 aku baru
menyadari betapa beruntungnya aku memiliki dia. Hatiku mulai bergetar…. Inikah
tanda2 aku mulai mencintainya ?

Aku terus berusaha mencintainya seperti yang engkau sarankan, Meisha. Dan besok
aku akan memberikan surprise untuknya, aku akan membelikan mobil mungil
untuknya, supaya dia tidak lagi naik motor kemana-mana. Bukan karena dia ibu
dari anak2ku, tapi karena dia belahan jiwaku….

Meisha menatap Mario yang tampak semakin ringkih, yang masih terduduk disamping
nisan Rima. Diwajahnya tampak duka yang dalam. Semuanya telah terjadi, Mario.
Kadang kita baru menyadari mencintai seseorang, ketika seseorang itu telah pergi
meninggalkan kita.

Jakarta, 7 Januari 2009 (dedicated to my friend....may you rest in peace...)

what if this happend to us?